New Words for the 2000s

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Blamestorming - Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible br br Chainsaw Consultant - An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee headcount leaving the top brass with clean hands br br Percussive Maintenance - The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again br br Uninstalled - Euphemism for being fired Heard on the voicemail of a vice president at a downsizing computer firm You have reached the number of an uninstalled vice president Please dial our main number and ask the operator for assistance See also Decruitment br br SITCOMs - What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids Stands for Single Income Two Children Oppressive Mortgage br br Starter Marriage - A short-lived first marriage that ends in a divorce with no kids no property and no regrets br br Tourists - People who take training classes just to get a vacation from their jobs We had three serious students in the class the rest were just tourists br br Alpha Geek - The most knowledgeable technically proficient person in an office or work group Ask Larry he s the alpha geek around here br br Dancing Baloney - Little animated GIFs and other Web F X that are useless and serve simply to impress clients This page is kinda dull Maybe a little dancing baloney will help br br Flight Risk - Used to describe employees who are suspected of planning to leave a company or department soon br br Generica - Features of the American landscape that are exactly the same no matter where one is We were so lost in generica I actually forgot what city we were in br br Nyetscape - Nickname for AOL s less-than-full-featured Web browser br br PEBCAK - Tech support shorthand for Problem Exists Between Chair and Keyboard (Techies are a frustrated often arrogant lot They ve submitted numerous acronyms and terms that poke fun at the clueless users who call them up with frighteningly stupid questions Another variation on the above is ID10T This guy has an ID-Ten-T on his system ) br br Square-headed Girlfriend - Another word for a computer The victim of a square-headed girlfriend is a computer widow

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