Clever Phrases

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Growing old is mandatory growing up is optional br br Insanity is my only means of relaxation br br Forget the health food I need all the preservatives I can get br br Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for they are sticking to their diets br br You re getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster br br Perhaps you know why women over fifty don t have babies They would put them down somewhere and forget where they left them br br My mind not only wanders sometimes it leaves completely br br Every time I think about exercise I lie down til the thought goes away br br God put me on earth to accomplish a certain number of things Right now I am so far behind I will live forever br br It s frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions br br If you can remain calm you just don t have all the facts br br Stress reducer Put a bag on your head Mark it Closed for remodeling caution - leave air holes br br I finally got my head together and my body fell apart br br There cannot be a crisis this week my schedule is already full br br The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing in the right place but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment br br The best way to forget all your troubles is to wear tight shoes

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